Drawing to a close

I know, I know... I'm a slack ass. I'm gonna really try to blog more - I just never think of it.

Well, my time at Innisfail State High School as the classroom music teacher is drawing to a close. I only have 8 more days. Its very sad. I have shed many many tears.
I have fallen in love with this place and these people. Its hard to think that just 10 months ago I was balling my eyes out because I didn't want to leave Brissy. Now I'm a completely different person. So much has happened. I lived through a bloody scary cyclone - of which is still really hard to share my feelings on, I learned how to play guitar and as a result have started writing songs, I played my violin on two separate occasions in a church service (playing solos) and I've played one of my songs in front of 50 people and I also sang Advance Australia Fair at the school speech night in front of about 600 people. I've moved house 3 times and taught high school kids.
5 years ago I would never have thought I'd be here.

I have a few challenges at the moment. One of my students is going through some stuff that she told me about. It really affected me to begin with - I've gained some perspective and now I'm just very worried about her. My future is also up in the air. I'm not sure what is going to happen. I really don't want to be moved next year. I love this town and I love my housemates. I REALLY REALLY don't want to leave. I know I just have to trust God, and most of the time I'm pretty good at that - especially in this case. But that doesn't stop the 'what ifs?’
I'm also a bit worried about going 'home'. Having Erin her has been and is fantastic. I have missed her so much - as I have missed everyone. But its made me realise that I don't know anything about The Gap. Half of my friends have barely said boo since I moved up here. I know out of sight out of mind. But I'm finding out stuff just now that happened ages ago. I'm just scared that I will return and I won't belong. I'm scared I will feel like an outsider, like a visitor to the place I grew up in and with the people who were my friends. I really hope I can just slip back in but deep down I know that isn't going to happen. I watched it happen with Jeremy. So I know it is inevitable.